The 5 Big Questions

It’s a staggering fact that there are so many people who live their lives in a state of despair. They do not openly express it but resign themselves to a dreary existence, mistakenly believing it’s the only option. Nothing seems to to bring true happiness. Distractions like games and other amusements only provide temporary relief. Guess what - I’m guilty as charged too. Perhaps more than I care to admit. Which brings me to this thought:

Vanity here refers to the emptiness of human pursuits and achievements. Essentially the author is asking, “What is the purpose and meaning of life?” Probably the most philosophical book in the Bible, Ecclesiastes’ author is clearly distressed by the fact that he found everything in life ultimately fleeting and meaningless. Until and unless one discovers God.

I remember standing outside my parents house one morning when I was 16 or 17, looking out at the big blue sky and wondering: “What is this life all about? What am I doing here?” I didn’t realize until much later that I was asking the basic philosophical questions. Some 20 years later, a Catholic priest told me in no uncertain terms one fine day - straight to my face - "ah yes - Jude - the philosopher!” Being labeled a half baked philosopher stung. Philosophers tend to have a bad reputation - see what happened to Socrates! So, for a while I avoided any reference to the like. But gradually I realized that it’s precisely because we don’t ask such questions that we end up messing our lives, living lives of desperation, and unfulfilled dreams.

It’s crazy to think that we’re born and made to express ourselves, and to lead our lives to the full. Yet our education systems often fail to foster this innate ability. During the early years of preschool, learning through play comes naturally and delightful! But the fun stops the moment elementary or primary school as it is called here begins.

In 1979, I discovered the same philosophical questions were being raised by a rock band! I kid you not.

Let’s get some assumptions out of the way. Life doesn’t unravel like we would like it to. And yet, in strange and beautiful ways, sometimes it does. Mostly we can agree life is unfair. It is one of the persistent truths - as well as the tendency to blame everyone else except oneself. Maybe that’s because we are asking the wrong questions. No wonder we keep getting the wrong answers.

So here I am again. More than half a century later. Asking the same questions but this time with a difference. Then I was inspired, now I feel tired. Then I was young, cocksure, and wanting to change the world. Now I am less sure and if anything at all, would like to start changing myself first.

But how does one accomplish that change? The answer is within. What drives you? What are your passions? Maybe it’s the great outdoors, or being skilled with your hands, a musical prodigy, or a professional athlete in sports. For me it was writing, and publishing whatever I created. I also had grand dreams of flying a single propellor plane - inspired by the Red Baron! Doubtless, that pipe dream died a natural death, but a few others remained, a little dimmed maybe, but still burning. Photography is one. And lately, I’ve discovered the magic of flying - my own drone. That is probably the closest I will come to actually flying any object anytime.

Long before Microsoft developed its Publisher software, there were many standalone desktop applications collectively called Desktop Publishing or DTP for short. So gung ho I was, I even completed a correspondence course on the subject. This was the dark ages of the digital era - there was no Internet yet, or online education. I was an instant unlicensed one man band publisher. Why? Simply because I could! I printed newsletters and flyers, business cards and assorted printing assignments that came my way. It was passion driven. And fun! It was like being back at kindergarten.

After I got married though, those writing and publishing dreams had to be put on the back burner for a while. Once the world had been my oyster - now the oyster was my world! Smaller, limited and more narrow in scope maybe, but nonetheless significant, challenging and mostly a wonderful experience. But the dreams were always there - gnawing away like a pain that won’t go away. Until it reached a breaking point. My dissatisfaction with work came to a head. Despite the steady income, a certain sense of job satisfaction and the benefits, the promises of promotion proved empty and the hard work unappreciated. The comfort zone had become jarringly uncomfortable.

We want change but in reality what we want is for change to happen without experiencing any pain. Sorry - that doesn’t happen in real life. I left my job a 3 years before my retirement. My colleagues were stumped. Nobody in their right mind leaves right at the end of their 37 years+ of service just like that. A few were so stunned they too applied for early retirement as well! I felt like Che Guevara! Ultimately a grand total of 4 of us left the building that same day.

All 4 of us went on to other completely different things with our lives. One became an Airbnb entrepreneur. Turns out it had been his burning passion all along. Another embarked on a religious pilgrimage to India with his entire family, something he acknowledges he wouldn’t have if he had remained working. As for me, I landed a 3 and half year gig as Office Administrator of the oldest Catholic seminary in Asia. Talk about a steep learning curve! But that is a tale for another day. Sadly, one of the foursome died just a little over a year after retiring due to terminal illness. I console myself with the thought that perhaps he found some solace in the year he had to spend with his loved ones, free from the constraints of work.

That’s a wrap for this week. I hope I have ignited something within you. But before I go, I’d like to leave these 5 Big Questions for you to ponder on:

1. Who am I?

2. What do I want?

3. Who do I want to become?

4. What have I been doing thus far?

5. What must I do now ?

And don’t forget to watch the video at the bottom of this page. Rock bands can teach us to ask the difficult questions too. Maybe that’s why their songs sell.

Here’s to asking the right questions - and getting the right answers.

Till the next time!

Jude